Wouldn't It Be Great? Funny Status Updates

Original and authentic suggestions for funny Facebook status updates and Twitter. Intersting, very humorous one-liners to get you Facebook Likes, comments and Tweets your followers will want to retweet!

• Wouldn't it be great if you could turn off your ears the way you can shut your eyes, so you could zone out whenever you wanted.
• Wouldn't it be great if when you loved someone they automatically felt the same way back.
• Wouldn't it be great if we all job-shared - 4 weeks on, 48 weeks off.
• Wouldn't it be great to work less hours for more money.
• Wouldn't it be great if you were born looking exactly like a Supermodel.
• Wouldn't it be great if your celebrity crush moved in next door.
• Wouldn't it be great if planes only took an hour to get to the other side of the world.
• Wouldn't it be great if the grass never needed mowing.
• Wouldn't it be great if you and your best friend had partners who were also best friends.
• Wouldn't it be great if you were able to build yourself your own dream house. In a day or two.
• Wouldn't it be great to have a fresh water lake in your own backyard.
• Woulddn't it be great if you could walk as fast as you can drive.
• Wouldn't it be great to be the star of the show.
• Wouldn't it be great if womans fingernails automatically grew coloured hot pink.
• Wouldn't it be great if you never had to shave.
• Wouldn't it be great if you were born to parents who were multi-millionaires.
• Wouldn't it be great to tour the world with your rock star lover.
• Wouldn't it be great if you ate crust and it really did make your hair curly.
• Wouldn't it be great if you could take a pill and grow taller or thinner in a day.
• Wouldn't it be great if it didn't take 3 minutes to log on to a computer.
• Wouldn't it be great if 6 out of 7 days were always summer.
• Wouldn't it be great if household appliances ran off solar power.
• Wouldn't it be great if you car ran on air.
• Wouldn't it be great to be able to turn your feelings off whenever you needed to.

• Wouldn't it be great if butterflies could talk, flutter down and ask you to plant more flowers.
• Wouldn't it be great if you could flavour your body odor so it smelt like perfume.
• Wouldn't it be great if you could dry a load of wet clothes in 3 minutes, just like using a microwave.
• Wouldn't it be great if clothing was totally disposable so you never needed to wash.
• Wouldn't it be great if you were a natural and earned a black belt after just a few lessons.
• Wouldn't it be great if you only needed an hour of sleep at night.
• Wouldn't it be great if there weren't so many rules.
• Wouldn't it be great to be able to stand in front of a crowd and sing without being nervous.
• Wouldn't it be great if you were a fabulous singer and dancer.
• Wouldn't it be great if you had a three hour lunch break.
• Wouldn't it be great if you only needed to work for the social aspect, because money grows on trees.
• Wouldn't it be great if money really did grow on trees and you lived in a forest.
• Wouldn't it be great if your bank paid you 10c for every one dollar you deposited with them.

• Wouldn't it be great to win lotto.
• Wouldn't it be great if when you turned your computer on, it was on and ready to use immediately.
• Wouldn't it be great if fast food was faster.
• Wouldn't it be great to have a drive through grocery store.
• Wouldn't it be great if your kitchen was as big as one in a restaurant.
• Wouldn't it be great to be the world champion of something!
• Wouldn't it be great if stilletto's were comfortable even after wearing them for 8 hours.
• Wouldn't it be great if you could always travel first class.
• Wouldn't it be great if some new fabric was invented so no clothes ever needed ironing.
• Wouldn't it be great if when you wished upon a star your dreams come true.
• Wouldn't it be great if everyone you loved could live forever.
• Wouldn't it be great if it was socially acceptable to drink milk from the bottle.
• Wouldn't it be great if it was socially acceptable to wear just a pair of shorts and shoes in public. For men and women.
• Wouldn't it be great if Facebook allowed you to add colours your profile page so it didn't look so boring.
• Wouldn't it be great if your boss let you work in your tracksuit and Uggs in winter.
• Wouldn't it be great if you looked hot in a Brazilian bikini. (Or you have a date who's wearing one).
• Wouldn't it be great to be able to be in two places at the same time.
• Wouldn't it be great to be able to be two people at once, so you could lead two totally different lives.
• Wouldn't it be great to be that guy who gets paid to travel the world looking for new ringtones.
• Wouldn't it be great to invent something incredible that everyone wants. Like the Post It guy did.

Author: StricktlyDating

Illustrations: Authors own.

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